Wednesday, 1 July 2015

I'm not saying it's been hot today, but two hobbits did just walk into my house and destroy the one true ring...

England is hot.
You've seen it on the news,
You've heard the rumours
And if youve stepped outside you've felt it. 

It is warm! 

So I'm going to contribute two tutorials today! The first is a refashion and the second is how to be British when it's hot. 

So tutorial! 

To be honest this is more like common sense (well at least i thought it was until one of the mums at nursery asked me how to do it!)

Children grow, they grow upwards and then they grow outwards, but you can pretty much bet on the fact that they will never fit their clothes properly, the waist could be too big but the legs are just right or visa versa.

Well here's what I do when the waist fits but the legs are too short. 

Get jeans 

Cut a bit of the bottom 

Do two turns up, it's really that simple (and kind of obvious) 

Here's lil knitwit wearing them in the paddling pool.

So here's my second tutorial:

How to cope with the sudden change to hot weather! 

1. Say "ooh it's hot , a lot"
2. Learn not to stare at topless men , either in admiration or disgust, either way they will think your pervy.
3. Try not to be topless everywhere, certain places require clothes, shopping for example, and whilst doing the school run, nobody wants to see you fondling the fruit and veg or picking up your kids topless. 
4. Eat dinner in the garden, ignore the fact there's crap loads of flys and that your dinners getting colder faster. Just pretend your continental and that your having a good time. 
5. Open and close your windows twenty times, same with curtains, try and work out which combination makes the room cooler.
6. Drink tea, it's a hot beverage but strangely refreshing? Plus your not sure what'll happen to your body during withdrawal. 
7. Drink loads of juice/water, make everyone else drink juice/water, force them! Dehydration kills! Consequently spend most of day peeing! 
8. Wearing a bikini top unstead of a bra.... Bliss! 
9. Use more tissues that during flu season because of stupid hay fever
10. Complain loudly about the heat you've waited 11 months for! 
11. Cover entire family in factor 50, suns rays do not prenetrate consequently have to use fake tan

Much love 

And enjoy the sun



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